Building Our Relationship: Our Journey Together
When people call us "couple goals" on social media, it makes me think about what that really means. The truth is, our relationship isn't perfect, but we've worked hard to build something real and meaningful together. Let me share what we've learned along our journey.
Our Foundation: Communication and Vulnerability
One of the most important things we've discovered is the power of being truly vulnerable with each other.
The Tools That Work For Us
1. Our Mission Statement
We created this together, and it's become our guiding light. One of our core values is being "heavy supporters of community and art and artists and creators." It's like our relationship's constitution, helping us stay aligned with what matters most to us.
2. Our Relationship Reviews
Early on in our relationship, we used to do these regularly. We need to get back to them because they were so valuable. We can't use 7 as a rating because it's too "safe." Our four key questions:
• Rating each other overall and explaining why
• What made us feel most loved
• What we felt was taken for granted
• How we grew together or apart
How We Handle Arguments
We've learned that sometimes texting works better for us during arguments, especially when emotions are running high. Jeannette gets to write out her thoughts uninterrupted, and I can't jump in with analytical questions (I know, I know, sometimes I need to just listen!). And despite what everyone says about never going to bed angry, we've found that sometimes sleeping on it actually helps us come back with clearer heads.
Understanding Each Other Better
We often know they'd like us to better anticipate their needs, and yes, keep working on that. It's not about mind reading (though that would be convenient!), but about paying attention and learning from your experiences together. Like making sure lunch is ready during short breaks - those small gestures mean so much.
Growing Together
What makes us work isn't that we're perfect - it's that we're committed to growing together. Through our:
• Relationship reviews (when we remember to do them!)
• Open communication about needs and expectations
• Willingness to be vulnerable
• Understanding that sometimes small gestures mean the most
I love that we can be real with each other. Whether we're dealing with work stress, communication challenges, or just figuring out how to balance everything, we're in it together. And yes, sometimes that means making noodles for each other when needed!
Our relationship isn't always smooth sailing, but with our tools, commitment, and ability to laugh at ourselves, we're building something special. We just need to keep communicating, stay vulnerable with each other, and never use the number 7 in our relationship reviews!
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